Being Lost

Guest post by Alison Gillaspie

Being lost is a scary feeling.  When I was a little girl, I liked to hide in the clothes racks of our department store while my mom shopped.  I always watched her feet to make sure she was still there.  One shopping trip I took my eyes away from her feet, and when I turned around they were gone.  Instead of calling out for Mom and discovering she was really close, I came out of the rack and began walking away from her.

Somehow I found my way in the front of the department store, crying for her.  Lucky for me, another mom found me and told me to wait with her right in that spot and my mom would hopefully walk by soon.  She bought her daughter and me a drink and we waited for my mom.  Shortly thereafter, my mom saw me sitting and waiting for her and she ran to me.

Unfortunately that is not the last time I would get lost.

For many, many years I have not known who I was.  I was a daughter, a sister, a cousin.  I became a Christian, a youth group member, and a student.  I was a college student, a sorority member, and a friend.  I am a wife, a mom, and a business owner.  Somewhere among all those identities, I was lost.  I did not know who I was.  I knew who people wanted me to be, but the true me was still waiting outside the department store, just like that scared little girl.

Realizing you do not know who you really are is a heartbreaking experience, but one I have not gone through alone.  I discovered over the past year that my identity had been all over the map but I had never allowed my identity to be a child of God, never allowed myself to ask God to help me discover who He designed me to be. I was trying to do it on my own and just walking further away from Him.  Instead of calling out His name and realizing He is standing right there, I had been going in the wrong direction.

Now I am seeing the path God is laying out for me.  I am no longer angry on the inside.  I am able to fully worship the God who designed me to be wonderful.

I am no longer lost.

I stopped and God found me, outside, crying and waiting for Him. And just like my mom did years ago, He took me by the hand and I am finally enjoying following in His footsteps and watching His path for me unfold each and every day.

Alison Gillaspie is the owner of Deep Rooted Marketing where she is a marketing virtual assistant and consultant.  She loves seeing women succeed in all aspects of life!  Alison currently lives in Lexington, KY with her husband and her two sons.

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