Column Post by Aj Luck
Did you ever pass notes in school? Did you get all fancy and fold them into neat little shapes with tucked in pockets? Did you save them? I did. I kept them in a shoe box tucked in the back of my closet. No matter how silly or serious the notes, I treasured them all.
Earlier this week I was faced with a situation that was difficult for me. I can’t pinpoint it, exactly; I just knew I was uncomfortable.
As I went to bed that night something kept gnawing at me, deep in the quiet places of my heart, the place reserved for my darkest pains—the ones only my secret keeper, my Creator knows and understands.
I didn’t pray. I tried to sleep. The gnawing invaded my subconscious all night long. I woke up the following morning, coffee in hand, ready to write my column. I had it all planned out. The more I typed, the worse the gnawing in my heart grew. I was uncomfortable. It was unavoidable.
Finally, I shut off the computer, grabbed my favorite pen and my journal and opened it to a blank page. Taking a sip of my warm, creamy coffee, I swallowed harder than I needed to. I knew I was about to wrestle an unknown pain on the page in front of me, and the best way I knew to begin the match was to start it out simple. I put pen to paper and wrote the following words:
“Good morning Lord Jesus… I’m sitting here this morning, cup of coffee in hand, struggling—more like wrestling, actually—and I need to talk to you about it.”
That was it. I wrote Him a letter. I told him all about the night before and the weird feeling I had.
It was then that something amazing began to happen. The more I wrote, the more He opened my heart and memory. Three pages in, He was reminding me of things from my past that were triggering these painful shards piercing my heart. He helped me name what I was wrestling. It was through my letter to Him that He spoke back. He met me on the pages, open arms, no judgment, no prerequisites. Just love and grace. As I wrote in honesty, He sent healing in revelation. I closed my journal feeling peaceful and free from my previous struggle.
I have a mental image that one day, in Heaven, God will smile as He hands me a shoe box. Inside will be all of my letters to Him that he has not only saved, but treasured over the years.
“For I cried to Him and He answered me! He freed me from all of my fears.”
Psalms 34:4 NLT
Friend, I encourage you to find your blank page, grab your pen, and begin to write out your heart before your Creator. I promise, He WILL meet you on the page.
There is healing through written words.
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Aj is a blogger, bookworm, wife and mommy, and an author of children’s books, spiritual thrillers, and inspirational works. Aj’s blog, Shattered Perspectives, is dedicated to encouraging and helping women who have suffered and/or are struggling with abuse. In her spare time Aj can be found nursing cold Diet Cokes and searching for awesome bargains in nearby thrift stores. She resides in Florida with her husband, son, two dogs and the biggest diva of a Siamese cat ever, and can be reached by email at email@example.com. For media requests pertaining to Write Where It Hurts, please contact Aj at info@WriteWhereItHurts.org.
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